Modified Radical Neck Dissection... I don't know about you but, the name of the procedure I was about to have just scared me. Dissection? Didn't you do a dissection on something that was dead? I once dissected a frog in 8th grade. Why was I having a dissection done? What all were they taking out?It was the end of January and I was headed back to Ohio to have my procedure done. I was feeling very low and depressed. TJ and I had stopped talking and I felt very alone. Although, the day before I headed home, we had talked and hung out for awhile. I was hopeful when I got back that we could hang out again.
So many thoughts were running through my mind. Was I going to have to have a surgery every 6 months? Why did the radiation not work?
I flew home and the next day and I had to go in for my surgery.
Surgery day had come and I was worried about the drain that they were going to have to put in. The thought of having a drain coming out of my neck freaked me out. I went in for my surgery and Dr. Shin was cheerful and eager to get started. She told me everything was going to be okay and she was going to try and get everything.
So I counted backwards from 10...9...8...........
The next thing I know I am waking up to Dr. Shin checking my drain. She was worried about the color of the fluid coming out. It needed to be a clearish yellow color and was a slightly milky color. She told me I needed to be on a low fat diet and that she would send a dietitian to talk to me about what I could eat. So, now I had a drain in my neck and I could not eat much. Not to mention my dad had promised me the cheesecake factory after my surgery and with a limit of 10 grams of fat a day, I'd say cheesecake was out of the question. They brought me my food which consisted of cereal, a salad with no dressing, and an apple. She told me I was to be on the diet for about 5 days and then I could go back to eating normal. I had chyle leak which is a leak in my lymphatic system. I either stayed on this diet or Dr. Shin would have to go back in and repair the leak. I chose the diet but was NOT thrilled about it, I wanted my cherry cheesecake!!!After a night in the hospital I was headed home. On the way home I started to feel nauseous. I got settled in on the recliner and fell asleep for a little. I woke up to feeling EXTREMELY nauseous. I went to sit up and go to the restroom but I could not make up, I threw up all over myself. Now, throwing up is crappy by itself but, when you just had neck surgery and have a drain in your neck it is even worse! For the first time I truly felt like a cancer patient.
As the days progressed it did not get much better. My neck was swollen, I could not shower with the drain in and I could not sleep flat on my back without feeling super nauseous. Not one friend had called or stopped over to visit me. I was VERY frustrated and sad. I felt like I was going through this without the support of friends. Thank God for family! My doctor and I had been texting back in forth. I had to send her pictures of my drain for her to assess if the diet was working. On Saturday, she told me I could eat a little more fat so I ate some spaghetti. Not even an hour later, the fluid in my drain was extremely milky. I was back to 10g of fat a day.I was scheduled to get my drain out on Monday but due to the amount of fluid my neck was still draining, the appointment got pushed to Wednesday, the day before I was supposed to return to Georgia.
When I finally got my drain out I was so HAPPY!! I could finally shower and wash my hair by myself! My neck was very irritated from the tape and was swollen and sore. I was happy though I was headed back to Georgia tomorrow to see TEEJ!
Then the snow storm of 2014 hit Atlanta and my flight was canceled. I was stuck in Ohio for another day. I finally got a flight out and was able to get back home. TJ met me at Groome and took me home. I did not know where we stood in our friendship, he took my bags up and left. I felt alone. I really wanted my friend back. About a half hour later, TJ text me that I could come hang out if I wanted. I was so happy to have someone here to hang out with.
Sense then TJ has been my rock. We have turned our friendship into a relationship that continues to grow each day. He is my support system and reminds me to be happy and trust in God each and every day.
Everything happens for a reason.
Isaiah 66:9 I will not cause pain without allowing something new to be born.
