Purpose Driven Life Day 25

Day 25, May 25th, "Transformed by Trouble" 

   - First off, I just want to say that this chapter has been my favorite chapter of the book thus far. It has spoke to me the most and has shown me a different perspective of my troubles. Through all the trials I have been through, this chapter is helping me understand them the most.
    - God has a purpose for every problem that we have in our lives. He uses circumstances to make us more like Jesus. Life is a series of problems. We all go through problems. Not all of them are big but, all are significant in God's growth process for us. 1 Peter 4:12 says, "Dear friends, do not be surprised at the fiery ordeal that has come on you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you." God uses the problems in our lives to draw us closer to him. Every problem we have is for a reason. Psalm 34:18 says, "The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit." Often times in our darkest day are when we have the most intimate experiences of worship and feel closest to God. For me this is definitely true. When I am going through a rough time I draw near to God and feel a close intimate relationship with him. "It is during suffering that we learn to pray our most authentic, heartfelt, honest-to-God prayers." (Rick Warren). We learn things about God and ourselves through our suffering, we draw closer to God. Through my broken heart and suffering I have drawn closer to God then I have ever been before. I feel God's present more and I here his voice clearer. "Problems force us to look to God and depend on him instead of ourselves." (Rick Warren). Living in Arizona after my break-up, I felt very isolated and alone. I prayed more than I have ever prayed before. I read the bible daily and meditated daily. Sometimes God has to get our attention and problems are the only way that he can

get our attention. "You'll never know that God is all you need until God is all you've got." (Rick Warren). For me I think I like being away from family and friends because it makes me draw closer to God, it takes me out of my comfort zone and makes me rely on God more. Now, I am not saying I enjoy being alone and not having friends and family around but, I need my own space and the times when I have moved away and did not know anyone, I felt the closest to God. Everything that happens to a child of God is filtered through God and he intends to use it for good even when Satan and others mean it for bad. Everything has spiritual significance in our lives. Romans 8:28-29 says, "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters." This does not mean that God causes everything to work out the way we want it to or that everything always has a happy ending. Only in heaven is everything perfect.  God can bring good out of the worst evil. Life events work together in God's plan. Everything that happens in our life happens for a reason and for a purpose. "God's purpose is greater than our problems, our pain, and even our sin." (Rick Warren). We have to go through battles to appreciate the great things in life.

BUILDING CHRISTLIKE CHARACTER

    - "Every problem is a character-building opportunity, and the more difficult it is, the greater the potential for building spiritual muscle and moral fiber." (Rick Warren). I have been through a lot in my 27 years of life and every event has made me a stronger person, spiritual, mentally, emotionally, and physically. Troubles produce patience - patience produces character. God wants us to be like Jesus so he will take us through the same experiences he went through. We will go through
temptation, loneliness, stress, criticism, rejection, etc. Romans 8:17 says, "We go through exactly what Christ goes through. If we go through the hard times then we're certainly going to go through the good times with him!" We go through both good and bad times but they are both to build christlike character.

RESPONDING TO PROBLEMS AS JESUS WOULD
    - We have to remember that God's plan is good, he knows what is best for us, he has our best interest at heart. Jeremiah 29:11 says, "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." When we go through times of trouble this makes it hard for us to trust in God's plan but we need to remember Jeremiah 29:11 and continue to meditate on it to get through the troubles. We need to focus on God's plan and not on our pain and suffering. It is all for God's good.
    - We need to rejoice and give thanks in his love, care, wisdom, power, and faithfulness. God goes through the pain with us and he will never leave us or forsake us.
    - We have to refuse to never give up. It is a slow process. We need to pray conforming prayers. Prayers like "Use this to make me more like you, Jesus" and not prayers of comfort such as "Help me feel good." "You know you are maturing when you begin to see the hand of God in the random, baffling, and seemingly pointless circumstance of life." (Rick Warren). Last Sunday, I went to church and I sat behind the young adult leaders at the church. I was nervous about going to the bible study because I didn't want to be the "old" adult. They talked to me about coming and told me I would not be the old adult and that they would love for me to come. That was all God, God placed me in that seat for a reason! We have to ask God what he wants us to do in every situation. When things go bad or we get in trouble we need to not give up we need to grow up!

Point to Ponder: There is a purpose behind every problem.
Verse to Remember: "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." Romans 8:28
Question to Remember: What problem in my life has caused the greatest growth in me?

Purpose Driven Life Day 22

Day 22, May 22nd, "Created to Become like Christ"

- God's plan has always been to make us more like his son Jesus. We humans are the only things made in God's image. All people possess a part of the image of God - but the image is incomplete and has been damaged and distorted by our sins. God sent Jesus to restore the full image. "This desire to be a God shows up every time we try to control our circumstances, our future, and people around us." (Rick Warren). How many of us try to control our future? I know I do. I constantly think of my future. Who will I marry? When will I have kids? When will my debt be paid off? Why can't I live in the present? If I'm not living in the future I'm living in the past. Why did my past relationships not work out? Why did I end up getting 2 degrees and am going back for a third to figure out what I wanted to do? Why, why, why? We, including myself, need to live in the present! God's ultimate goal for us is character development. His goal is to change our character not our personality. Life is suppose to be difficult, it enables us to grow. We go through each of the difficult times in our lives to help us grow. We exist for God's purpose, not vice versa.

GOD'S SPIRIT WORKING IN YOU

   - "It is the Holy Spirit's job to produce Christlike character in you." (Rick Warren). Sanctification is the process of changing us to be more like Jesus. Only the Holy Spirit has the power to make changes God wants us to make in our lives. Sometimes he nudges us with a gentle whisper or a huge tug. 1 Kings 19:12 says, "After the earthquake came a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper." Often times the Holy Spirit just talks to us in a gently whisper or through someone else.

WE MUST COOPERATE WITH THE HOLY SPIRIT'S WORK
    - Obedience unlocks God's power. We have to be obedient in order to have the blessings God has in store for us. God often times waits for us to act first, its how our character develops. In order to grow spiritually we have to actively participate. We have to make an effort to become like Jesus. Surround ourselves with people who are on the same spiritual path as you. Listen to music that will help you growth. Get connected with your church family. We have to let go of our old ways. Change the way we think and develop Godly habits. Post break-up I am struggling with this. I have such habits of texting my ex and its not because I'm holding out for him, its my crutch. It gives me comfort. I know I need to stop messaging him but I continue to do it, its my crutch. I will get there but why can't I cooperate with the Holy Spirit?

GOD USES HIS WORD, PEOPLE, AND CIRCUMSTANCES TO MOLD US

   - "God's word produces the truth we need to grow, God's people provide the support we need to grow, and circumstances provide the environment we need to practice Christlikeness." (Rich Warren).  In order for us to become more Christlike we need to read God's word regularly, connect regularly with other believers, and trust God in difficult situations. Trust is hard for me. God ALWAYS comes through for me and I have no reason not to trust him yet, still when I am put in a difficult situation I question God and its is wrong and sinful. Often times God uses people rather than miracles. He wants us to connect with others not just be in isolation of prayer and bible study. We need to have fellowship.

BECOMING LIKE CHRIST IS A LONG, SLOW PROCESS OF GROWTH
   - Spiritual maturity is not instant or automatic, it takes an entire lifetime to reach full maturity. We
are only finished growing spiritually when we get to heaven or when Jesus returns. God is more interested in what we are more than what we do. He looks at our character not our job description. We have to make an effort to become like Christ or the world will bring us down.

Point to Ponder: I was created to become like Christ.
Verse to Remember: "As the Spirit of the Lord works within us, we become more and more like him and reflect his glory even more." 2 Corinthians 3:18b
Question to Consider: In what area of my life do I need to ask for the Spirit's power to be like Christ today?

Purpose Driven Life Day 14

Day 14, May 14th, "When God Seems Distant"
   - I don't know if I am the only one but, I feel closer to God when I am going through a storm. Most people feel close to God when everything in their life is going good, for me its the totally opposite. I draw closer to God when I'm going through a storm. I feel the most connected when I am going through a difficult time, I turn to prayer and to the bible for answers. The deepest level we can get with God is praising Him in spite of our pain. Sometimes God seems distant to us. This is for a reason. God becomes distant to mature our relationship with him and help us grow spiritually. Just like our earthly relationships are often tested with separation, you will not always feel close to God. God never leaves us though, He is always there for us. Psalms 37:28 says, "For the Lord loves what is fair and right. He does not leave the people alone who belong

to Him. They are kept forever. But the children of the sinful will be cut off." God says he will never leave us BUT, he did not promise we will always feel His presence. Just because you may not feel His presence does not mean God has left you. You are not alone. Every Christian goes through it at some point in their lives, it is vital to our development and our relationship with God. God tests are faith through these times. Rick Warren says, "The most common mistake Christians make in worship today is seeking an experience rather than seeking God." We should go to church to seek God rather then seek and experience or an emotion. "Faith, not feelings, pleases God." Rick Warren. I feel, from experience, the situations that stretch you the most will often times be the biggest blessing in your life. Pastor John Ryser at Damascus Friends Church in Ohio said, "Whenever God is going to do something big in your life you will be stretched. Whenever God wants to do a great thing in your life you will have a difficulty. He confronts people with difficulties because he's got something great planned." How do you continue to praise God when He seems distant or you feel you are being stretched? There are four ways:
   1. Tell God EXACTLY how you feel
      - When you are going through a storm and have anger, doubt, and fear. Tell God. Unload all your emotions on God. He can handle it and he wants you to. Rick Warren says, "Admitting your hopeless is a statement of faith."
   2. Focus on who God is - His unchanging nature

   - V. Raymond Edman says, "Never doubt in the dark what God told you in the light." Often times we doubt what God has told us when we are going through a storm. If God laid something on your heart and told you something, he will make it happen in due time. In the meantime you can always find things to praise God for. Praise God for allowing you to wake up. Praise God for your health, education, family, friends, etc. I recommend if you are having a hard time doing this to start the 100 happy days challenge. For 100 days post a picture of something that makes you happy that day and then praise God for that.
   3. Trust God to keep His promises
     - When we are going through hard times we need to be patient and realize that God is taking us to a deeper level of maturity spiritually. TRUST ME I am the most inpatient person, this is very difficult for me. It's funny though because my patient's often tell me how patient I am with them and I always tell them, I am patient with you but when it comes to my own life, I am extremely inpatient. Rick Warren says, "When you feel abandoned by God yet continue to trust Him in spite of your feelings, you worship him in the deepest way." Sometimes we just have to let go and let God take control. Trust in his promises.
   4. Remember what God has already done for you
     - If you can't think of anything in your life right now to praise God for remember what he already has done for you. He sent His son Jesus to die on the cross for you so that you would not have to spend eternity in hell.

Pondering the question of the day, I need to remain focused on God in the good times as well as the bad. Everything happens for a reason and we need to praise God in the storm and on a clear sunny day!

Point to Ponder: God is real, no matter how I feel.
Verse to Remember: "For God has said, 'I will never leave you; I will never abandon you.'" Hebrews 13:5
Question to Consider: How can I stay focused on God's presence, especially when He feels distant?

Purpose Driven Life Day 10

Day 10, May 10th, "The Heart of Worship"
 

  The word surrender is almost always used in a negative way in our society. Surrender typically implies losing and no one likes to be associated with being a "loser." Rick Warrens say, "If winning is everything, surrendering is unthinkable." Romans 12:1 says, "So then, my friends, because of God's great mercy to us...offer yourselves as a living sacrifice to God, dedicated to his service and pleasing to him. This is the true worship that you should offer." We as Christians need to fully surrender to God and live our lives the way he wants us to. Often times this is hard and we think we know best for ourselves but we don't. There are 3 barriers that block our surrender to God.
     1. Fear - Can I trust God?
         - This is hard for a lot of us. I struggle greatly with this but why? Has God ever let me down? Has God ever steered me in the wrong direction? No, he hasn't everything he does for me is for a reason. We can not trust God until we know him better. We need to get to know God on a deeper level so that we can trust him more. "Fear keeps us from surrendering, but love casts out all fear." Rick Warren. We need to fall in love with God like we fall in love with our spouse, children, significant other. An example given in the book is, "If you want to know how much God loves you, look at Jesus with his arms stretched out on the cross, saying, 'I love you this much! I'd rather die them live without you'" That is a powerful illustration and one we should think about more often. We can't let fear get in the way of fully surrendering to God.
     2. Pride - Admitting Our Limitations
         - A.W. Tozer said, "The reason why many are still troubled, still seeking, still making little forward progress is because they haven't yet come to the end of themselves. We're still trying to give orders and interfering with God's work within us." So often we as humans try and be God. We try and fix all of our problems when we can't. We have to understand out limitations and accept them and surrender to God.
     3. Confusion
        - A lot of people are confused an don't know the Lord. If they don't know the Lord how can they surrender. Sometimes people are confused about things and seek other sources but God.

  What it means to SURRENDER? 
     - Surrendering means sacrificing your life or suffering in order to change what needs to be changed. C.S Lewis says, "The more we let God take us over, the more truly ourselves we become - because he made us. He invented all different people that you are and I were intended to be...it is when I turn to Christ, when I give up myself to His personality that I first begin to have a real personality of my own." When we turn to God we become more of the person he intended for us to be. I know just by going through these 10 days that I am looking at thinks differently, I am seeing the world differently, I am seeing people differently. SURRENDERING IS DEMONSTRATED BY OBEDIENCE...even when it doesn't make sense. Do you think I want to be back in Northeast, Ohio? No, I don't but I am surrendering to God and letting him take control. Rick Warren says, "You know you're surrendered to God when you rely on God to work things out instead of trying to manipulate others, force your agenda, and control the situation." I don't have a job right now, but I am trusting on God to get through school and provide me with a job so that I do not have to blow through my savings. This is always a test for me and this time I've just fully surrendered and I am letting him guide me and lead me and figure it out. You also know you have surrendered when you don't react to criticism and try and defend yourself. Surrender is like warfare against our self-centered nature.

   The Blessing of Surrender
      - We all eventually surrender to something or someone but it should be God! If we do not choose God we will choose some other idol to surrender to. "We cannot fulfill God's purposes in your life while focusing on your own plans." Rick Warren. We really need to have a relationship with God. We need our quiet time with him and we need to be able to hear him and communicate with him. Prayer, mediation, reading the bible. We need to be like the song by Carrie Underwood, "Jesus Take the Wheel," we need allow him to take the controls. Surrendering to God is not a one time thing, its a lifelong journey. We have to practice surrender and make it a habit. When you completely surrender you will be tested. Things will come up to test you to make sure you are fully surrendered to God.
There still are several areas of my life where I have not fully surrendered to God but I am not perfect and I am working on it. One step at a time. Here is a song to listen to.

Point to Ponder: The heart of worship is surrender.
Verse to Remember:  "Surrender your whole being to him to be used for righteous purposes." Romans  6:13b
Question of the Day: What area of my life am I holding back from God?
      

Purpose Driven Life Day 4-6

Day 4, May 4th, "Made to Last Forever" 

     We were made to last forever. Thats right, LIFE ON EARTH IS NOT ALL THERE IS! "Your earthly body is just a temporary residence for your spirit." Rick Warren. There is so much more to life then are time here on earth. 2 Corinthians 5:1 "For we know that if the tent, our earthly home, is torn down, we have a building from God - a home not made with human hands, eternal in the heavens" If you think about it eternity is only heaven or hell. If you have not accepted the Lord Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior then you are going to be spending eternity in hell and if you have accepted him you are going to be spending it in peaceful, blissful heaven. "The closer you live to God, the smaller everything else appears." Rick Warren. If we start living for God and not everyone else here on earth we become closer to God and start to see our purpose on earth more clearly. In order for us to make the most of living you can't have short term thinking you must have long term thinking. We have to think more about eternity. This life here on earth is just the tip of the iceberg, eternity is everything

else we can not see of the iceberg. Your purpose in life last for eternity! A lot of us think about eternity when someone passes but in reality we should think about it more often. Hebrew 13:14 "For here we do not have a permanent city, but we seek the city that is to come." Pondering the question of the day I believe I should stop worrying about the future and start living my life and serving God, trust in him, he's got a plan.

Point to Ponder: There is more to life than just here and now.

Verse to Remember: "This world is fading away, along with everything it craves. But if you do the will of God, you will live forever." 1 John 2:17

Question to Remember: Since I was made to last forever, what is the one thing I should stop doing and the one thing I should start doing today? 

Day 5, May 5th, "Seeing Life from God's View"
    Do you every wonder how God views your life? It's a good question to ponder. Rick Warren says, "The way you see your life shapes your life." So, how do you see or view your life? This is a hard question for me, I honestly don't know how I see my life. I guess I would say I picture my life like driving up Pike's Peak in Colorado Springs. Lots of windy roads, beautiful scenery, beautiful views, scary twist and turns, and when you finally get to the top its a breathless view. I have a lot of twist and turns in my life. I thought I was going to get a gymnastics scholarship and go to Kent State for college for a long time. I ended up with no scholarship and went to Eastern Michigan. I've had cancer 3 times. I had a break up from the person I thought was to be my future spouse. Each one of these experiences has brought me to be a stronger person and has given me different beautiful and breathless views on life. I'm not to the top of "Pikes Peak" yet thats heaven! Romans 12:2 "Do not be
conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect." God's view on life is metaphoric in the Bible in 3 different ways, only the first 2 are talked about in this chapter the 3rd will be talked about on day 6.
    1. Life is a Test
          - Our character is developed and revealed by the tests we go through. I'm going through a test right now in my life. We are constantly being tested. Tests from God can be overwhelming and some we barely notice. Some areas that we are tested in are; major changes in our lives, delayed promises from God, impossible problems, unanswered prayers, undeserved criticism, and senseless tragedies are just a few. "How do you act when you can't feel God's presence?" There are times when God draws back from our lives to test us and our character. At times like this he is preparing us for more responsibility. 2 Corinthians 32:31 "God withdrew from Hezekiah in order to test him and to see what was really in his heart." God never allows the tests in our lives to be greater than this grace. At times for me this is hard. There are times when I feel God's presence so much and other times I don't and really have to toon in on his word, mediate, and prayer journal. Everyday and every second we have an opportunity to deepen our character, demonstrate our love, and depend on God. I listened to a sermon last night by Rick Warren and he said you should spend the first 7 minutes of your day with God. Don't watch the news, don't check your phone, turn your alarm off or press the snooze and pray, mediate, read the bible. He said it will significantly increase your mood. I tried it today and will continue to do it. When we pass a test that God gives us we are rewarded eternally.
    2. Life is Trust
           - "We are stewards of whatever God gives us." Rick Warren. We don't "own" anything on earth , God loaned it to us and he will loan it to someone else once we go to heaven. "Society says if you don't own it you won't take care of it but, as Christians we live at a higher standard, because God owns it." Rick Warren. We should never boast about our accomplishments because we didn't do them on our own. God helped us. God gave us the talents to accomplish them. God gives us more the more he trust us. This is where I want to stress tithing. There is only one place in the bible that God asks us to test him and its with our tithe. Tithing is giving 10% of your income to the church before taxes. Now I know for a lot of you, you are thinking I could never do that! I'm telling you you can! Trust in God, test him. I have been tithing now for 3 years, I may not had a lot but I have always had enough to pay my bills. I have more in savings then ever before. I will never stop tithing. Trust in GOD! "God says there is a direct relationship between how I use my money and the quality of my spiritual life." Rick Warren.

Point to Ponder: Life is a test and a trust.
Verse to Remember: "Unless you are faithful in small matters, you won't be faithful in large ones." Luke 16:10a
Question to Remember: What has happened to me recently that I now realize was a test from God? What are the greatest matters God has entrusted to me?

Day 6, May 6th "Life is a TEMPORARY assignment"
     Life on earth is so brief compared to the eternity that we are going to spend in our home in heaven as christians. As christians we should not get too attached to anything here on earth because compared to the time we are going to spend in heaven, life here on earth is so brief. We as christians should ask God to see life how he sees it, this will help us to get a better perspective of are time here. People that come over to our country for work get "green cards" that they have to carry around with them; as christians we should get "spiritual green cards" to live on earth because this is not our ultimate home. We are citizens of heaven not earth. God says that we should not care to much about
earthly things, we should not live for the here and now, we need to think more eternally and not flirt with earthly things. In James 4:4 God even calls it adultery to be friends with the world more than him, "You adulterous people, don't you know that friendship with the world means enmity against God? Therefore, anyone who chooses to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God." Rick Warren says, "...its easy to forget the pursuit of happiness in not what life is about." So often we get caught up in pursing everything here on earth and we forget about God and ultimately what life is about. I know I do this. When I get "happy" I stop going to bible studies and my prayer life diminishes to only the times when I need God. In reality I ALWAYS need God and should never turn my back on him. Yesterday we talked about the two ways God views life and today I am going to talk about the third way.
     3. Life is a Temporary Assignment
            - "In order to keep us from becoming too attached to earth, God allows us to feel a significant amount of discontent and dissatisfaction in life - longings that will never be fulfilled on this side of eternity." Rick Warren. We will never be 100% happy here on earth because this is not our permeant home! Heaven is! This one is hard for me, but we shouldn't waste our time worrying about something this is so temporary. I am the biggest worry wart! I worry about not worrying. This is an area I so desperately struggle in. I need to have more faith and trust. God has a plan and everything happens for a reason.

Point to Ponder: This world is not my home.
Verse to Remember: " So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary but what is unseen is eternal." 2 Corinthians 4:18
Question to Consider: How should the fact that life on earth is just a temporary assignment change the way I am living right now? 

Remembering EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON!

First off, I apologize for not writing for a long time but I have been through so many ups and downs. Good news is I have been in remission for 3 years now!!! I came to the realization today that I have a blog that is titled "Everything Happens for a Reason" yet, I struggle with believing that. Currently, I am going through a hard break up and I am learning to trust in God and trust in myself. Every day is a struggle for me. Each day I wake up and I feel the devil on one shoulder trying to bring me down and God on the other side picking me up. I was so invested and so committed to this relationship, I sacrificed so much and loved so deeply. I forgot a lot of the values and rules that God has given us, I lived with the guy before marriage. Now I know that living with your significant other before marriage is common these days but its not biblical and God's not going to bless the relationship if you do not follow the rules he has laid out for us. We are both christian's and knew better but due to our own selfish wants and financial gains for moving in together we lived together. Now I've learned my lesson and I will not do that again and I will seek God more and follow his laws that he has laid out for us. Don't get me wrong I do not regret the relationship at all I have learned a lot and I have grown a lot in many areas of my life. I am physically stronger and healthier. I am spiritually the strongest I have every been. Mentally I'm a work in progress as the ending to our relationship ended by him telling me that I am everything he wants in a spouse, I made him happy, but I did not get "God's vote in marriage". That messes with my mind a lot but I am working through it and will be stronger and closer to God with the battles I am facing. Financially he taught me so much from tithing to saving and eventually investing. I've learned that everyone comes into your life for a reason, a season, and a purpose whether good or bad. I have so many good memories and some not so good memories but the good memories far out way the bad. Thank you TJ for all the good memories, I am grateful you were a chapter in my life.

But here I am and I have a blog that is titled "Everything Happens for a Reason" but do I believe it? I'm struggling hard with that, this guy was everything I wanted in a spouse. I felt secure with him and he filled the voids I had. I had a warm feeling with him and now its gone. It's been about 5-6 weeks now and I have gotten closer to God and I'm learning a lot about myself and a lot about what exactly I want. I've been in a difficult situation sense he is deployed, I've been living with his family in AZ to finish school and again save us money while he is deployed. I am moving back to Ohio at the end of the week, finishing my clinical assignments for physical therapist assistant school, taking my boards and then I will see where God directs my life from there. I'm learning more then every to lean on him and trust in him. I struggle with once I am happy and things start going great in my life I stop spending my quit time with God. I feel when I am with a guy I get some idolatry going on with them and its not right. I need to also put God above all and lean on him all the time not just when I am going through a storm.

I've met some great people through social media pages and blogs and some old friends that are here to support me every step of the way and through every minute of the day when I need them. My family as well have been very supportive. A few songs that are getting me through these difficult times are "Every Storm Runs Out of Rain" by Gary Allan, thank you Brett Macy for that suggestion. Another song that was on my phone and came on when I got in the car all the time is "By Your Side" by Tenth Avenue. Now, this song when I heard it would make me so angry because I would think of my ex and be like no your not by my side but one of my friends, Justine Carlson sent it to me in a email and it made me realize that this song isn't about a worldly man being by your side its about God being by my side through everything. All worship songs have helped as well but the one that gets me every time and has sense I was baptized is "Whom Shall I Fear" by Chris Tomlin. Whenever I hear this song I feel God's presence and I know that something good is about to happen in my life. It puts a smile on my face whenever I hear it.

I recently started rereading Purpose Driven Life by Rick Warren. I have read it before and you are suppose to read a chapter a day and take it in journal about and talk about it with someone else. My best friend Liv Lawnick and I are doing it together and I am going to try to blog about it every week to show what I am learning and growing. There is 40 chapters and 40 days is very spiritually significant time period in the bible. God shows that 40 days is a spiritually significant in many ways. He shows whenever he wants to show someone there purpose he takes 40 days. A few examples of this is Noah's life was transformed by 40 days of rain and Moses was transformed by 40 days on Mount Sinai. For the second time reading this I am going to go through it like you are suppose to a chapter a day for 40 days and see what God shows me. Now I think I know my purpose and through sermons I have heard throughout the years especially by Bill Purvis at Cascade Hills Church in Columbus, GA, I know what my spiritual gifts are they are serving. I feel so fulfilled helping others and having an impact on there life. It's taken me a long time to figure this out but physical therapy is definitely what I am called to do its just where? in what setting? in which state? and with what type of people? I hope to learn the answer to these questions over the next 40 days and the months leading up to taking my boards and applying for jobs.

Another friend of mind recommended some sermons to listen to to get me back to "baseline". I have only listened to 2 of the 7-8 he has recommended but they have really helped me understand EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON. The two I've listened to so far are both by Rick Warren. The first one is titled "Winning the Hand you are Dealt" and the second one is titled "Transformed: Change your life by Changing your Mind". Both have been
amazing and I highly recommend listening to
them, they can be found on youtube. Also any sermon by Bill Purvis or Brent Purvis from Cascade Hills Church, they have a app or you can go onto there website and listen to them.

It's all about finding myself again! Finding Jenn. It's amazing how in one instance you can think you have your whole life figured out and in the next your lost. I will get through this and I will bounce back stronger and better then ever. God is bringing me back to Northeast Ohio for the time being and as much as I don't want to go back to my hometown and live with my family again, no offense family :) I'm just 27, I know God has a purpose for me there. I pray he reveals it to me. I think I know what is. I think I am suppose to help my sister get back in church and get saved. I think I'm suppose to help my brother's girlfriend find her purpose. God has a plan and it will be revealed. I know I don't want to stay in Ohio but he is calling me back there for the time being so I am going to embrace it. We will see where God leads me from there once I graduate and pass my boards. He's got a plan and I just need to TRUST HIM.